What women want?

This last week we continued on in our series about men. We tried to answer the age-old question, “what do women need”. As promised here are the two remaining things we didn’t get to Sunday.

After Abram’s poor decision with Sarai he got caught. Pharaoh himself caught Abram and had it out with him then kicked him out of Egypt.  In all the dialogue between Abram and Pharaoh and then between Abram and Sarai (when he told her they had to move again) guess what we don’t read? AN APPOLOGY! Look at it for yourself – Genesis 12:17-20. There are three simple words Sarai needed to hear Abram say, “I’m an idiot”!

Following in line with Sunday, the 6^th thing your wife needs from you is for you to

(6) APOLOGIZE & TAKE OWNERSHIP.

Abram had plenty of opportunity to apologize to both his wife and to Pharaoh but instead of manning up and taking responsibility he just keeps quiet and kind of sleeks out of Egypt. This is what a lot of men do when they have sinned against their wife; they just stay quiet and sleek out of her presence. If they don’t do that then they blame her. And maybe she isn’t innocent in whatever the issue is, but when I read Pauls’ words in Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”  

God’s response to your, “she’s to blame too” is, “I don’t care”.  You role is to love her like Jesus loved the church, and HOW did Jesus love the church? He died for her when He was innocent and she was guilty. He gave up His right to be right. He took the blame that wasn’t His to take. He died on her behalf, and for her sins.

You might be thinking, “Well that sounds like a bunch of crap!” That’s why only a MAN who loves Jesus can truly love a women, this is no business for self-centered little boys.

Next time there’s a conflict, whether you’re more to blame or she is, man up, and love her like Christ loved the church; like Jesus loved HIS bride. Ask Him for the grace and the strength then take the road less traveled to experience the beauty of a marriage that only a few do.  

Ok, last thing but this last one is usually pretty misunderstood. So, let me start by first saying that if you aren’t practicing steps 1-6 then you have NO BUSINESS trying this one, you’ll also have no credibility with it either. 

(7) LEAD HER

Now usually when we hear, “lead” we think, “control”. Leading isn’t controlling, it’s simply knowing where you all need to go and then going there first.

 Look at Genesis 13:1-4

After all his mistakes Sarai could have easily told Abram to go jump of a cliff before she trusted him again. Likewise, Abram could have sulked in shame and decided he had lost the right to lead his wife, but he finally begins to lead in a godly way again. He lead her and his family BACK TO the place where God had once told Him to go back in the beginning of chapter 12. When Abram left the Negev to go to Egypt he chose to lead his family away from where God had told him to go. Now, he’s leading them back to the Negev and specifically to the place where, “he had first built an alter”. Abram is leading his family back towards God.

As a husband, a father, a man, this is what leading is all about. Leading is about you pointing your wife and your family towards Jesus, and you’ll always lead best by example. Abram got home, stood at the alter and, “called on the name of the Lord”, that means he got on his knees and did business with God in front of his family. So how are you leading your family? This doesn’t mean you have all the answers, you just know who does and that in His presence is where you and your family need to live. So how are you leading in issues of:

·       How to spend money – do you lead them to pray together about it or do you spend how you want not leading them to consult the great giver?

·       How to treat people that have hurt them – do you lead them to take it to Jesus and ask for his grace and strength or just talk negative about people that frustrate you?

·       How often is Jesus a topic of conversation in your home or do you just go through the busyness of the day and He only gets talked about on Sunday at church?

·       How do you deal with stress – do you lead your family in prayer throughout seasons of stress asking for God’s peace or do you just get quiet and snappy and fanaticize about summer vacations?

·       The list is endless but I think you get the idea. Leading is not controlling, but IT IS pointing your wife and family towards Jesus in all things, in all hurts, in all situations, in all decisions, in all disappointments, in all joys, …

So, here again is the pledge we took as men this week; a pledge to the wife and to the women in our lives.

She is the daughter of our creator,                           

the Lord Jesus Christ.

I commit to loving her,                                                                       

by loving and following Him first and foremost.

I commit to cherishing her,                                           

and sharing my heart with her.

I will fight for her,                                                                

apologize to her,

lead her towards Jesus,                                                    

and love her with my words, my actions and my time.                                                                                        

Adam & Eve Series - Man Pledge

I am a man,

made in the image of my creator, my father, the Lord Jesus.

I have nothing to prove,                                                     

I have no one to impress.

I will stop hiding,                                                                   

I will stop fighting.

I will lay my life out before Jesus, open, honest, raw, and real.

I will let him shape me,

make me,                 

be my strength and my life.

That I may bring that strength and that life,               

to the world around me.                

Who Should You Listen To

GREAT post from another pastor I often read & listen to. This was something I needed to read today & just thought maybe some of you need to read it as well, enjoy!

Just Click Here ---http://www.perrynoble.com/2011/11/17/who-are-the-people-i-should-listen-to-eight-qualities-to-look-for/

250/150/50

This last week I met a guy at Paradox that reminds me of a lot of the stories I've heard lately.

"I started coming recently because _________ invited me. I've never been a church person but I really like what you guys do here so I keep coming."

Two things stick out here.

1. God seems to keep giving us favor with the people we started this church for.

2. Invites are powerful! When we have the courage to ask a friend to come with us to check out our church statistics say they are more likely to say yes than to say no.

This is why we have committed to fast together every Wednesday. We are acting in faith that God will continue to use our church to reach the people we already know with His love, and to do it through our lives.

Simple prayer today as you fast until dinner is -- God please use me and use Paradox to reach the 250!

Becoming Less - 250/150/50

Ever had that experience of sitting on a plane, sandwiched into the middle seat? You can only sit straight up with your feet in front of you, and your hands in your lap for so long before you’re just ready to open a door, and jump out into the wide, open, expanse of the blue sky you’re flying in.

Or course, that would be a flight that wouldn’t end well, at least not for you!

The last time I was in that situation I can remember pulling in my arms so they didn’t touch the guys next to me. I can remember pulling in my legs so I didn’t accidentally end up playing footsies with my new neighbors. I can remember the strain in my neck from trying to keep it upright while I tried to sleep. Although these were big guys, with big shoulders that were probably pretty comfortable!

I can remember thinking, “the only thing left to do is to literally shrink the size of my body”.

That was not an enjoyable flight.

We sometimes think of what Jesus is trying to do in our lives as a similar experience. We tend to think that what God is up to is squeezing the life out of us. With His expectations, & lists, & stuff He requires. It can all seem like He is just trying to take the enjoyment of life away from us. So, we tend to hold back & hold out for fear that if we give into Him too much we’ll be miserable. So, it’s easier to then hold onto life than to let it fully go into His hands.

The Paradox though, is that life done with God is the one pursuit where the more you lose your life the more you not only find life, but you gain more of God in the process. More encounter, more experience, more understanding, more…

In the Bible, in a book called John there is a verse that talks about us shrinking that He may grow.

John 3:30

“He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.”

Part of the reason we’re spending every Wednesday fasting together is to embrace the practice of becoming less by denying ourselves SO THAT we may gain more of Him and all that He has in store.

Let’s be in prayer together all day today for all that God has planned in each other’s lives & in our church. Praying for the 250 yet to find their life in God!!

250/150/50

If you weren't at church on September 25th then you HAVE TO catch up with us!

We shared the vision God has given us for this next 2 years and it was one of the most exciting Sundays we've had in a long time! If you missed it you can listen HERE - just click on the week of 9/25/2011, the title is "250/150/50".

After that Sunday we decided that we would pray and fast together each Wednesday as a way of asking God to do the miraculous among us & through us.
Today we kick off that fast & today as I pray with you, my prayer all day will be for God to freak us out as He leads us to greater impact than our church has ever known.

To fast, you simply need to give up food for the entire day or at least for one or more meals. I know many people that will give up eating until dinner for a day long fast. However you do it, remember to pray throughout the day for the vision and dream of 250/150/50.

Here's a verse that challenges me even when I feel hungry enough to eat my computer!

I Corinthians 9:24-27 24 Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! 25 All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. 26 So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. 27 I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.

October Series At Paradox

Starting this October we'll be spending an entire month on Sunday mornings dedicated to work, and the mixed feelings we have about it!

Some of us love what we do, some of us hate what we do, many of us wonder if we're doing what we should be doing.

What do we do if we're in the wrong job, how do we make a change, how to we stay in a job we can' stand, does God care about how I feel about my job? If I break the copy machine how do I make it look like another employee did it?

Are all just some of the questions we'll be tackling. It's going to be a fun series with a lot of good advice from people learning to apply their faith to their work.

Check out HERE to read more.

Go HERE to watch out promo video.